OkCupid tricked me and it made me sad.

OkCupid tricked me. It tricked me in a way that made me very angry. So you remember how I was saying that when someone sends you a message OkCupid sends you an email with the first line of the message (so I generally know in advance if I’m going to have a good OkCupid day or a bad OkCupid day). Well I got an email and the only line I could see gave me hope! It read, “Hey! What kind of science programs are you involved with? Science is cool! : )” I WAS SO EXCITED!! I was thinking “there’s NO way this guy is  a big, creepy, weirdo!” I have literally never been more wrong in my entire life. MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE. So I didn’t log in as soon as I got it, because you know I didn’t want to seem too anxious…so I waited about 12.5 minutes and then logged on, only to find that those 12.5 minutes of excitement about the potential of receiving a nice message from a guy who could be interesting was a complete and utter lie. This is what the full message said:

Hey! What kind of science programs are you involved with? Science is cool! : )

[I knew I was going to be upset when I saw he had typed more]

I gotta say, I’m a big fan of some jungle fever action; black women are great.

[has he lost his whole entire mind? Also, I don’t know what that means, but I know I’m angry.]

Are you up for drinks this week?

[I would sooner stab myself in the eye with a spoon]

Jim (name has been changed, even though I should have left it so if he ever reads this he can know I’m talking about him and his idiocy).

As you all sit with your jaws on the floor at this monstrosity of a message, let me tell you, my jaw was on the floor as well. I don’t understand people’s incessant need to say horrible things. Jungle fever? What in the world?? And the thing is, I didn’t respond, but I almost feel like I did society a disservice by not telling him that his lack of social skills were appalling. After further investigating his profile it turns out that he’s probably a sociopath…so…we dodged a bullet!...kinda…awkward. On a more serious note: being fetishized because I’m black is not a thing I will tolerate. You either like me because I am awesome, or you don’t. 

Any who…I went on a date last week (not with the sociopath, in case that wasn’t clear)! It was in no way whatsoever a love connection…it wasn’t even really a friend connection, but he was very nice (and as a dear friend of mine would say “being nice doesn’t get you any points, you’re supposed to be a decent human being”).  BUT I am going on a date tonight as well…so stay tuned to hear how it goes!

Next week we’ll discuss the absurd amount of time and thought that goes into an OkCupid message. I’ll give you hint: I had a 5 minute long discussion with my friend about whether to use a period or an exclamation point in a message…and that wasn’t the first time.

xoxox,

Leigh